생일축하합니다 Jessica!!!

(I still don't believe any strangers read this blog, but if you do, excuse this personal message of love and just enjoy the numerous photos included herein)

DAMN MY INTERNET CONNECTION - SORRY IT'S LATE :(

If I had sent you a card, here's what would have been written inside:

"Really glad I found you girl
You surely better my world
Your so damn fine, that's word! - One of a kind, ya heard?
To the end we'll go, you'll see
Love is all for you and me, yeah..."

Yeodongsang, my beloved Jessica, it is your birthday today and even though we are on opposite sides of the world, and neither of us are with our beating hearts in Korea I wanted to throw you a hypothetical K-pop laden birthday party of your dreams. Unfortunately my fluctuating internet connection has other ideas and so it has become somewhat abridged, but please use your imagination to fill out the rest.

The guest list would include the previously mentioned "come of age day celebration party guestlist" as well as the obvious candidates including (but not limited to) all of BIG BANG, SHINee, BEAST, 2PM, 2AM, MBLAQ, and of course recent acquisitions Teen Top. (you may question my inclusion of ALL members of the groups, I know you don't want Yeosob interfering when you're trying to have a deep and meaningful moment with DooJoon, but its so that they can perform their hits for you, although i'm not sure about all of Super Junior because maybe we don't have enough chairs) Girlfriends (as in yours, not as in for the boys!!! of course!) would be represented by 2NE1, BoA (with a special jpop birthday song for you), HyunA and perhaps Jung Joori.

Girls would arrive first as usual, help you choose an outfit whilst 2NE1 give you a personal rendition of "Let's Go Party", they would bestow you with a generous amount of smokin hot k-pop fashions

"My heart's fluttering, It's already the 8th time I've changed my clothes, I brushed my hair several times, And I'm only looking at the mirror .... There's still a lot of time left, But what was I so nervous about? I'm half worried, half excited, But I know that it's on"

and pretty soon you'd be in the party mood, "Let's go party, now work that body!" and then the guests would start to arrive:

Taeyang would be so delighted with your recent review that his eye smiles would all just become one long endless eye smile. You'd open the door and he'd be there beaming, brandishing a big giant bunch o' roses for you, pink not red 'cause you guys are friends not lovers right!?:

GD would bestow you with multiple gifts (most likely some questionable accessories..), he'd be dressed in his best and perform a special rap with attitude just for you, I'm pretty sure he'd refer to you as J-dragon in the rap, and there would be multiple references to being his lady, being his shawty, "taking his hand", him "giving you what you need"and "giving it to you straight up and down" (giving GIFTS of course..) when you thought he'd spoiled you in every way possible he'd be waiting for your attention whilst having transformed into adorable bed head cutesy Jiyong clutching an oversized teddy bear gift:

T.O.P would offer everything GD did and more, midway through your special birthday rap recital he would remove his sunglasses and give you an extra special eyebrow twitch, it would without a doubt be the most erotic experience of your lifetime. There would be many more birthday treats in store for you in your own special VIP birthday after party for two, but as for material gifts: "John galliano, Dior, Louis vuitton, Kris Vanassche, YSL, Dolce & gabbana, Givenchy, Alexander McQueen" anything you want babe, and of course Dom Perignon Pink:

2PM & 2AM would show up with Jay Park and no issue would be made of it (what a birthday gift that would be! like peace on earth!) I think they would all be decked out in their springtime best for you, bowties, waistcoats and boat shoes, with lots of buttoned shirts, and ever so slightly messy bowl cuts, although beastly brooding guyliner look could be requested. Of course Jo Kwon would make some kind of spectacular entrance:

Junho & Taec spend the day working on a cake together, just for you:

I cannot stop looking at junho's face here, although taec here is also mesmerising

CN Blue would arrive in co-ordinating suits brandishing a cake topped with tiny sugar replicas of themselves (i'm not sure why one of them is playing a keyboard but just let it go this time)

Despite his unfailing cuteness, you may choose to slam the door in the face of Sungmin and his over the top strawberry monstrosity (i'll leave it up to you whether im talking about the hair or the cake), although if we can find him a suitable hat i'm sure he could be allowed to enter, providing he sits at the opposite end of the table:

I debated as to whether or not to include this one, it does seem to lower the tone a little..

Pre Minho injury I would have arranged for SHINee to burst out of a giant cake debuting their wild new look and give your party the very first performance of their new single. Since Minho would probably be wheelchair bound with his leg cast, you'll have to settle with a fabulous Key dance, poppin Taeminnie, and some of the Onew/Jonghyun double act.

By this time you would have more boys and cakes than you know what to do with, it's possible you might have to dodge the seemingly Korean tradition of getting your face smooshed into your cake (as Rain demonstrates so beautifully here), but I wonder if, like me, you hate the notion of other people smearing food on your face or messily feeding you (honestly I HATE it, I'm not even sure if the tables were turned I could let MBLAQ try and feed me ice cream blindfolded - although I have no problem with being the blindfoldee) so rather than fend of an over excited Bang Mir trying to thrust some frosting your way I would have made it clear before hand that they are only to cake each others faces (whilst you could just sit merrily and applaud). To demonstrate , here's one of my favourite examples from Seungho's birthday:

Please notice how ever hungry Seungho (I have seen him eating with TWO sets of chopsticks on more than one occasion..) cut his own cake whilst holding a half eaten banana in his other hand:
To cut a long story short (sorry!), there would be k-boys galore, club bangers, charm appeals, dance offs, maybe even that "thrust off" we've been waiting for, a million gifts, a million cakes and it would all end up with a giant sleepover. It would be the most wonderful hypothetical birthday party there ever was, and if I wasn't in danger of this becoming my first fanfiction novella (or losing my internet connection) I could have carried on elaborating for another 10 days.

Oh but of course we would capture the memories forever with a gazillion photographs,
here's you and 2PM posing with a few cakes:

Notice Junho is by your side, Taec and Chan snuggling up close behind you, Khun and Wooyoung at a modest distance but near enough and R Kelly is a good foot away.

Happy Birthday dearest!

I'd like to think at least part of this came true for you, even if its just the cake part.

PS. I felt like I didn't use nearly enough GIF's so here you go:

- BUNNY

Finally, I am ready for Solar

It has taken a while, but I am back by Taeyang's side with a smile on my face. For someone who claims to adore Taeyang as much as I (often platonically), you may be wondering why there has been a total lack of reaction to the fact that he has just released his first solo full length album, Solar. If so, you and me both. I thought the release would send me wild a la T.O.P, have me typing to the point where I was almost sick down myself from my joyful garggles. But this didn't happen. I'm still not sure why. Maybe this was always going to be the case. I mean, if I insist on listening to songs like Where U At and Wedding Dress on constant repeat then these songs being on the album is hardly going to blow my mind in the same way hearing/seeing the songs the first time round did, and other songs are always going to have a fight to stand up to them. Essentially, I just was not blown away. I think I wanted something rap-ier, harder, not so much of the love songs which I ended up with.

And the single I need a girl wasn't quite what I was craving either, even with the GD rap. The original MV is nice, lots of Taeyang and Dara (2NE1) and GD in bowtie and comb over and later a lepeoard print shirt...
but it still wasn't what I was looking for. Taeyang didn't even change his hairstyle or loose the frontal shave, though he claims that that (and the terrible facial hair) are down to him being too busy and not caring enough about what he looks like. I'm not sure that I believe him, but I'll agree to it to save myself the upset that his style intuition is not quite that of T.O.P's.
The live stages too, I could take or leave really (sorry!).

But then I started to listen to the album properly, not just the advance release teaser tracks, and it began to grow on me. Albums are put into a certain order because they work well in that way, and this is definately true for Solar I believe. The intro works great (I've blocked the few seconds of creepy children), asking me if I'm ready for solar, as it actively prepares me; it calms my rushing k-popped pulse rate a little, which is good for me I know, and takes it down a notch or two for what is to come.
Superstar, track two, didn't thrill me at first, but it's a real grower that has taken root. Then there's I need a girl. Once you get past the nervous, hungry and desperate title, his voice is lovely, and it is a nice song. Remember he also plays the piano. I like to imagine him playing along, rather than dancing around with the creepy stubble beard. And again, GD gambling and rolling around the floor in the video helps.

I like the harp at the start of Just a feeling and, again, it is a really lovely song. Very summery.
Next up, You're my. At first I didn't like this, mostly because of the (terrible)English lines. "You're my chocolate, my sweetest chocolate, I really wanna have you-u". A little suspect if you ask me - ignorance is bliss in such cases, had it been in Korean I would have had no qualms. But his voice IS that of velvety chocolate. Get past the dodgy English shock to the system and you'll learn to love it.

Now it starts getting good, with good ol' Teddy (1TYM) let out of his cage, "this is for the ladies!"
I'm actually obessesed with this song, Move. Not a banger in the conventional sense, but fantastic. And Teddy's lyrics KILL me:

...and your body is my wonderland,
I could play all night,
(so just move move, baby don't stop it)
I cock it and I load it,
call me mister big rocket,
you so precious, face shinin' like crystals,
I'm so vicious like Sid with my Sex Pistols...

...Niagra falls, baby I got you wetter than...

Go Ted. So sexual, so punk. I never expected so much from him. God knows what the live performance will end up sounding like though. If you've heard him on GD's Shine a light Leaders you'll know what I'm getting at - over excited child at a party.

Ah, Breakdown, more like let down. It sounds like it's going to be epic, for the first few seconds at least, some proper hard rap, and then it just gets a bit.....jokey, for want of a better adjective. But even this is growing on me, or I'm softening. Either way.

After you fall asleep, in translation, is the next track, and it totally has me. Repeat worthy and all. I can assure you that I will be doing some more research into this Swings fellow.

So yes, after that is Where U At andWedding Dress(both prior digital releases) and Prayer and another off the mini album released last year. As afore mentioned, no surprises but all super songs.

And last, certainly not least of all, Take it slow. Don't laugh, but it reminds of my childhood and Annie Lenox whilst actually making me feel mid-coital activity. I don't understand it either. And maybe too much, sorry, but it really does. It's so beautiful, but it's almost too much. So slow but with the capacity to have my heart race like some of the best club bangers.

Anyway, I'm sorry. No more.
But I guess what really consolidated all this was LISTENING TO THE LIMITED DELUXE EDITION on repeat in my car all weekend. Yes, you read right. Bless Tower Records.

I don't know how much I like the T-shirt itself, but really, just to have it and know it's mine. GD blates has one, and does T.O.P for sure. If it's good enough for them...

Oh yeah, and the YG FAMILY card! I'm so happy/proud/excited to have this in my wallet. All I need now is an A.N.Jell/You're Beautiful one and I'll be off.

I don't really know what the card or serial number means. But I will be researching this too. And the one of however many photos I got was the one with leather gloved hand to mouth, and "God Bless You" 'hand written' in the corner. How sweet.

It's times like this when my imminent departure from Japan breaks my heart.

Giving me all I need

Teen Top, I couldn't be happier for the moment, not really. You have given me hot debut photos, intense teasers and CLUB BANGERS, most importantly. Now all I'm waiting for is the full on MV to rock my world, and you'll have me in the palm of your hand. This has been a great couple of days then.

First, this happened:

Oh L.Joe, how did I know so early on that it would be you! I'm not sure if you can see well here but the freckle on his lower eyelid. Yikes. These are the things I live for. And a selca with Hyuna of all girls. If it can't be 2NE1 then she is always the runner up for me, alongside BOA. Excellent work L.Joe.

And then of course the teasers followed.

Some piano to start out with, in the tradition of so many a wonderful teaser, not least of all 2PM's recent Without you. We have a hint at the music then, which is already sounding good to me. And silhouettes become the real boys, all in white, angels. A toy plane? I love a toy plane, and why not. Here's hoping that this is a direct reference to a model building hobby. And then there is the dancing sneak peak; the shrug is so 2PM Heartbeat to me. And oh god, here it goes, (I know you're not bothered Bunny but..) L.Joe on violin. Is there anything that this boy cannot do?! I couldn't believe my luck. Still can't. Freckles, toy planes and violins. God I hope he gets the knit wear out come winter. The dance moves by C.A.P even seem to incorporate some violin simulation in.
Basically, bar a couple of hair qualms and a few accessory trifles, this is the prefect teaser for me. Job well done boys.

So, something that I left out of the teaser comment, only because it pops up even clearer in the debut photos, L.Joe in baseball jacket:
Yes, yes, yes. One of my all time FAVOURITE pieces of clothing. And in such a lovely blue and white with red highlight. And bowl cut too of course. No one else in the band has any shots wearing anything remotely like this. Let's just pretend that it's "models own" and be done with it. So dreamy.

Basically ALL L.Joe's photos are perfect, you can see that for youself. And the other boys didn't do half bad either. I'm enjoying C.A.P's Jaebeom style coiff a lot too:

And inevitable high tops.

In the rest of these pictures the short of it is that Niel is just precious, as is Changjo, Ricky has hair charms andChunji, I can't quite put my finger on it yet, but there is something in a little hesistant over, but nothing terrible.
So the debut pictures were on the hole good, and where it mattered most to me they were great.

So then came the audio tracks, something I was very nervous about. Apparently I had no need to be either. The intro, Come into the world (hopefully not a sick reference to how recently they were born) has all the drama and exciting build up that I have come to expect from a k-popped mini-album track 1. A hint at the melody of the song to follow and a heaviness which weighs on your heart, soon to explode. It reminds me a lot of BEAST's Shock album intro as well as 2PM, and that is no bad thing.
Clap, the debut single and track 2, follows on excellently and is brilliant. There are claps, of course, and some type of synth beat which is oh so catchy and totally ups the ante from the piano in the preceeding lead in. When the chorus hits, "I'm so cra, cra, crazy, cla, cla, cla, cla, clap..." my oh my. It is stuck in your head within seconds and pulls you along with such force. I love it. It reminds me of so many things, yet feels so unique at the same time. I see some Italo disco there somewhere and some WHAM(?) for some reason... who knows. I love it whatever it is.
Finally, Let's Dance is another club banger. Some Spanish guitar bringing to mind MBLAQ and an "You (r)leday" a la BEAST's Jonghyun to open. It's great. "Go shake it, go shake it, go shake it, shake it, baby shake it, go shake it, go shake it, go shake it, shake you booty shake it". These boys have a way of repeating words that is going to get me everytime, I can tell. If it works for TOP and GD, it's totally working for them too.

It's so rare and such a joy when the whole mini-album is good, and this one is great by my standards.

All we need now is some sweet "one two step" and the better half of the debut photo cosumes to be used in the majority of the MV and it will be all it needs to be. I know these boys can go all the way - "Let's get in hot in here"

"Hello sexy guy and hello handsome boy and hello hello"

From a classic GD style "Hello" to an even more classic set of self introductions. Meet Big Bang at the start of Idol World, 2007:

Dearest GD, looking around 15 years old(pretty much still was); (hidden) snaggle tooth and all. "I'm your believer", god I'm glad he soon stopped using lines like that." A completed leader", I guess I'll allow him that one.

Taeyang, forever making puns on his name; back then and even now with his new Solar. Hot passion, for god rather than girls, but hey ho. Like GD's afore mentioned line, I'm glad Taeyang waved a fond farewell to these corn rows. A wise move certainly.

It's a good job that I have never fallen in love then, isn't it. Don't get me wrong, I love Strong Baby, but there's just somthing about ol' V.I. that I can't quite get past. And "Charisma boy", I wonder if SHINee's Minho saw it and stole it?

Forever putting a smile on ones face, but maybe here for the wrong reasons. Yes you are fantastic Daesung, you are wonderful. But this pony tail is not. I literally got the fright of my life when it went to camera two, revealing this travesty. What a way to start out. No one else has gone crazy babes, just you, with this hair.

Best til last, Big Bang's natural smoky.

He was on it from the word go, of course he was. And the look on his face as he tells us - could he be any more smoky or sincere? I think not.

This Idol World post will one day be what it should be, full of numerous screen caps of unforgettable formative Big Bang moments, but for now, this will have to do. Tales of
an awakening GD who has flashbacks of being drugged, getting up and discovering a 'bear' in the next room; GD and TOP using all their might to spread Daesung's legs; TOP trying to lie about not having "skin ship" on a first date.

In fact, talk of TOP's loves cannot wait. Because what followed this was then a claim that he has no interest in girls! Don't break my heart babes. However, when asked about porn
the lie detector machine which he is hooked up to starts blinking - apparently his attempted denial is a lie. Upon which he gives in - he has already lost this battle (see hand over face): "I watched it when I was in elementary school". YIKES. 5th grade, at a friends house. That would be 11 or 12 years of age then. He even tries to backtrack from this by saying his friends dad is a man? Really I think this is irrelevant TOP, is not every friends dad a man? Not such a quick thinker back then evidently. I couldn't love him more for it. Dirtbag from the word go - maybe this is why he has the finger gestures he does.

Watch Baby Baby at 3:07 to see them slide horizontally, side to side. We can finally be sure where he picked this up.

Dear Dips

Tic tic tok, my heart explodes
My heart pounds, I can’t breathe
Pick whatever you want, there’s no need to explain
You know me, I’m a man with no problems, T.O.P
Wanna run with me? Feel me~
I’m a black belt from Double B*

*Big Bang

Lollipop pt. 2

Teenz on top?

And when I say teens, I mean teens. Teen top - the official name of this brand sparkling new band. Their musical stand point, "emotional teen pop band". Boy oh boy, I don't even know what to make of this, which is why I feel the need to work it all out publically (and legally).

So, what first hits me is the name. I know half, or a least a portion, of the boys I lust over are barely legal. And thanks to dearest Bunny I just had yet another Dongho (UKISS) scare, but anyway, to put this fact in the name itself - now that's just bullying your poor old nunas.

After reading the name again I realised that I had seen it before; this is the six-member group which will be featured on MTV USA this September. Their company T.O.P Media claims the show is to be named "Vice Guide to Everything". Does this mean it's actually a Vice production? I'm not sure, but I am sure that k-pop is starting to get a bit bigger certainly than it was over in the west, and I hope that this band will set a good example and not embaress me and my nearest and dearest.

Apparently, since January, MTV have been combing for idols who have yet to debut. As it turns out, this programme will show the boys at the time of their actual debut, as well as some of the formative stages. According to some sources, one of the MTV associates claims that, "Niel, who is the lead vocalist, has the tone of a young Michael Jackson. They are fit to compete in markets overseas too because the English skills of one of their members is at the level of a native speaker." Well, how about that, UKISS.

Without further ado, lets have a peek at the members. The websites for them are all in Korean and as I'm only a beginner I'm not so hot at navigating this, so you'll have to make do with some real tooty pictures I found with English descriptions:

Always best to start with leader. So, a whole 17.8 years of age - they better get big sharpish before he outgrows his teens. He seems tall-ish, I can say that much, and I do love me a rapper. An artiste too! Actually, I've seen one of his drawings on twitpic (yes they have a twitter). I reckon he's probably better at exercise, but at least he's trying.

Oh, dancing boy, how snazy! '95, hmm, that would make him still 14, and yes, still in middle school. -----MAKNAE alert----- However, with music appreciation as a hobby, how edearing. But I'm stopping here. Self-defence skills, he may need these...

Power voice, I look forward to being blown away, but all 52kgs of you. Now we are onto '93, moving up - up and out of danger. It's legal, just. Although he is in 2nd grade middle school apparently - is this because he maybe spent too long in kpop training and not enough time at the books? Imitating something as a hobby though, how scintilating! Puzzles he also gets brownie (or should I say Cubs) points for.

Devil bad rapper. Now this is what I am talking about. With a face like his, 'bad' rap skills and some piano on the side, we may just have out next Seungho (MBLAQ) protege right here. There's even English as a speciality - could it be than I've already discovered my 16 year old ichiban?

Emotional voice and a profile picture way to genki for my liking. I'll blame it on him being not quite 16 yet, but I don't like it all the same. I'm also not into soccer - sadly this one may be a bit of an early write off. Also, Niel, what a name to choose from all those cool western names you could have had, like CAP or L.Joe...

Oh god, even reading 'lovely Ricky' makes me want to holler out in a Bianca (Eastenders) style fashion, and that's without this terrible gormless picture to accompany. Poor boy, he barely stands a chance with that kind of introduction. Lucky for him I've seem some slightly better evidence of him about the interweb, in the form of twitpics again.

So yes, welcome to the boys. Fresh faced and none yet out of school (though we may have a drop-out on our hands).

Next up, the music. I saw a clip of their debut live stage, one of their own songs maybe(?), and I was not enthralled, but then I discovered this darling clip:

How sweet of them. And seriously, Nirvana t-shirt, are you kidding me. DREAMBOAT. I knew that L.Joe had my heart from the start, I just knew it. Those sick piano skills, the grunge edge. What a pair, honestly. And I take back all the mean things I said about you Niel, I LOVE the emotional voice. I was a bad nuna and I did wrong, and no you're not too genki either. The smiling looks they exchange, it's precious, just precious. And they re so fresh and clean that they aren't even covered in jewels yet!! I'm too excited. Taeminnie (SHINee) you certainly have some competition.
Having seen this and then looking through some of the comments prime viewers are making I do feel a slight warning: "The pianist is on fire! The vocalist is like a Korean Justin Bieber. My interest is piqued~" snarkybookworm1989. Yes, this is the demographic that I have evidently entered myself into. Oh dear.

But then even better that this is the whole band, covers galore:

YES. Couldn't have chosen better myself! 2PM baby. This is what I always want. All kpop bands should model themselves on this, and then it can't go wrong, can it? Grow up to be beastly idols my young boys, and you will surely do well.


And not forgetting HEARTBEAT! I wish I could find a better quality one for you, but sadly I can't as of yet. You can hear them, just, and they do good! And the dancing, well done boys. I am totally satisfied by this cover, and to achieve this praise they have pretty big boots to fill (we are talking Junho, Taec and Chansung here). We even have the acrobatics at the end!! So nimble at their young age.


And some Big Bang to follow? Of course. They really have picked THE BEST hyungs available. Lies, such a banger too. We even have some real good T.O.P attempts with the rap, possibly by L.Joe, and I'm not going to laugh at them, as I'm pretty sure he was going for gold. We can't expect him to have a voice as deep as T.O.P's yet, he's still going through puberty for christs sake. The silhouetted thrusts at the beginning too... that's the way to do it.

Having written this then, and touching on the surface of what is to come, and having had an emergency conference with my one and only K-sensei, I am totally sold on Teen Top. This may be my answer to your Infinate Bunny. The only problem seems to the the name - there is no way to really make this sound plausable, but I guess I'll get over that in time.

I see high tops, I see skinny jeans and a cap. There is even what I would dare say are bowl cuts. A name is just a name, right?

The debut title track Clap is to be released on 9th July. I will be there ready and waiting with open arms. I am begging, hoping to god, to the high heavens, that this is not a BEAST Bad Girl repeat. Please let them have a good debut song, and a mini album with club bangers to boot.

Note the pussy bow that Niel is rocking. Dreamy!

For more of your researching needs see:
Their official website
Their YouTube channel
Their flickr
And Soompi for general articles